Waiting

It's been awhile since my last update, so I thought I'd check in.... I'm still at MOBAP. After two weeks, I'm done with this place and ready to be home with my family. The good news is that I should be getting my walking papers soon. Most of my meds have been transitioned from IV to oral and I should be taken off the IV nutrition today, hopefully. The way I look at it, I can dispense pills at home, so why shouldn't they let me go? They keep telling me that I need to get up and walk around more, so being at home would be a beneficial thing for my recovery, right? I'm practicing my arguments for when a doctor finally visits. Which is always a crap shoot on the weekend. Well, I wish I had something else to blog about, but that's it for now... Thanks for all the support and I hope to see you all soon!

What a mess!

I just met with my surgeon and he informed me that my guts were a big mess... Apparently, I had an absyss in my small bowel as well as a fistula connecting my small bowel to the colon. So he removed about 12" of small bowel and 3" of colon total. With this information, I know that there wasn't enough medication in the world to make me better. The absyss would have needed surgical intervention regardless.

Last night was really rough with the pain as well as the incoherance from the anethesia, but once my PCA (pain pump) caught up with me, I've been feeling moderately better. It's been difficult to sleep since I can't really move around, but that should be improving throughout the day. They already want me to get out of bed today and I know that it gets a little easier each time. Still no predictions on when I will be released, but hopefully I will be able to progress my diet tomorrow.

Thank you everyone for all the thoughts and prayers. I am really lucky to have so much support among family and friends.

Love,
Jen

New project

While I've been couped up in this hospital bed, I have had lots of free time to plan various projects and activities for when I get released, but that wasn't giving me much immediate gratification. So, I decided to pursue an idea I've had for some time... Another blog focused on household tips and activities designed to enhance our daily lives. I know that's pretty broad, but I'm still exploring the direction it will take (especially once I return to other life obligations). I would love for you guys to check it out and feel free to offer any suggestions that you would like to see appear on the site in the future!

http://the-frugal-family.blogspot.com/

(FYI- I did change the URL on the new blog which you can locate through the above link or on my side bar... "The finer things in life"

'Roid Rage

As I'm sitting here in my hospital bed reeling from the exorbitant amount of steroids coursing through my body, I figured perhaps it would be cathartic to get some of my swirling thoughts down on "paper." For those of you unfamiliar with cortosteroid therapy, it's very similar to what I believe menopause would be like... Aside from the physical symptoms of hot flashes, night sweats, and bloating, there are also lots of mental and emotional side effects to contend with. Anxiety, aggression, and depression are the most common, however, right now I'm really struggling to calm my mind. I've tried distraction with various forms of media, sleep, meditation, and even pain killers to shut off the overwhelming thoughts, but nothing is working. The interesting aspect is that it is almost a state of mania... I keep thinking about the wonderful impact that this surgery will have on my quality of life and can't stop myself from making ambitious plans for post-op. I just can't help myself from continually sitting up to jot down ideas of projects that I hope to accomplish. I'm wondering if it manifests from my concern about being the best mother and wife possible. Most of my ideas center around providing for Allison through craft projects, games, and other household tasks. I've always recognized my tendency to over commit to lofty ideas, but with my unpredictable health, it's not easy to follow through. And as I step back and look at my life, I want more than that for Allie. I'm sure much of this isn't unfamiliar for new moms, and I know how lucky I am to have such wonderful role models in my friends and family. So, thank you for taking time to read my out of the ordinary post, and thank you all for the abundance of support you have provided me and my family.

Love,
Jen

I think I can, I think I can...

Muster up the energy for a blog, that is... I wanted to update in order, but I do have a bit of an important announcement to make. After a lot of fighting for the last 5 weeks, my body finally threw in the towel and I knew that it was time to go back to the ER for some more serious medical attention. So, on Saturday, Matt and I headed to MOBAP. Due to all the red tape and insurance bull, I had to go through the entire process in the ER to get admitted into the hospital for IV meds and observation. All of this took about 6 hours before I was even able to see the ER doctor. Needless to say, I was not doing well by the time the wee hours had approached. But finally after much crying and hysteria, they finally understood that I needed some serious help. I was brought up to my room at 4am and began IV steroids and antibiotics as I had done the previous two visits. Only with the baby living in the real world, they didn't hold anything back. In order to get things cleared up (I practically had a full on bowel obstruction Saturday) I am on very high doses of steroids (yeah, 'roid rage) and multiple antibiotics to calm the inflammation. And after much consultation with various physicians, Matt and I came to the difficult decision that the best treatment for me is to have another bowel resection and try to start another treatment regiment with a clean gut. The hope is to have the surgery done laproscopically so that my healing time is minimized. In conjunction with the meds and bowel rest, I should be in a pretty good place for the surgery on Tuesday. I am unfortunately very hungry (intravenous nutrition isn't very gratifying), but feeling about how I did when I was home so it's managable.

I had really forgotten how it felt to be healthy, so I am looking forward to post op and being able to enjoy life pain free. But it's not just for me... I am really looking forward to being the mom that Allison deserves. She's already developing so fast and I want to be able to keep up with her and provide her with every opportunity to explore life to the fullest. It is truly amazing how much a baby can change your... well, everything! So, here's to hoping that I will have made a full recovery by June 28th and you'll see me in the mountains!